I Am A Jerk To Pathetic People

Apparently I Am a Saint who knows 100 girls, but 37 of them happen to be phony. I was raised by a feistily authentic Mama, so you can’t blame me for having the ability to smell poop from a mile away. #Bitch 1- 37 all took a dump in my contact list and left it smelling like human guano. I am taking you through a diabolical journey of satire. If you can relate, you are Welcome!

Bitch 16 went M.I.A, stopped posting pics on IG and started putting those corny inspirational Whatsapp statuses; Then I thought there had to be a million dollar question behind the silence.. Like she is saved or something,… Naah she ain’t met Jesus, she is pregnant, surprisingly not by me. She and her squad once called me a prude coz I refused to fuck her, I didn’t have a condom… Jokes’ on you bitch, you were too horny for your own good.

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Contraception is free in Kenya girl, condom fatigue is a guy’s call stamped by a woman. Seems like bitch 16 was sleeping around and not condomizing.. She probably ghat herpes. I used to regret not fucking her but now I don’t… Damn, her lingerie was good though. Pretty Pathetic.

Bitch 5 is a dude named Brandon who got his ass dumped recently.. Now he is getting soppy in WhatsApp statuses, airing fuckboy vulnerability linen in public while there is unlimited booty out there. Brandon, shooting subliminals makes you look like the pussy that dumped you. From my perspective I think you are mopping coz you still wanna go back keep your face in her puss.

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Don’t be a wuss like Brandon-Bitch5. He is a pansy loser.

Girl 9 ain’t a bitch, she friendzoned me. Rejection is a bitch am telling you, especially if it comes from someone as hot as girl 9-Fania. Don’t laugh at me, I have a fragile ego,.. Each time I was with her, I had a condom in my pocket, but she locked the body language and forced me into that small box of friendzone not knowing am claustrophobic. Don’t be like Girl 9, she is bad.

There is no such thing as a slut, people like to fuck, Get over it. But there is a girl called Tina- Bitch 7, the main reason I wrote this article actually. Tina best friend boyfriend fucking her cousin, her cousin she think her baby by Tina boyfriend, Its confusing as hell.. Some sort of cacophony of fucking whereby Tina got nailed by all my homies. She is making me related to my friends, soon the whole hood is going to be related Like an African tribe, misplacement situated.

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CHILL BITCH!!!

Am eating popcorn and I can’t wait to get to the end of the movie where all pathetic people die.

Saintly Jerk


Twitter: @mighty_leny

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SOCIETY KILLS

In this world we live in, we are literally swimming in clichés of life, norms, stereotypes, sects, vices and vanity. Sects like government & religion are like the principal forces contributing to the bulk of human behavior. We all know our parents weren’t rebellious so they adopted as cups of tea preconceived notions of what can sustain a human being, now rebellion in youths comes handy in these instances of the older generation letting the society tell us what we have to do.

It was hammered to my head that college is the ticket to a good life….but some career goals don’t require college. It is more about having the guts to embrace who you are rather than following the path society carved out for you.

If the shoe fits wear it, I have my Lenny Moments of Epiphany once in a while, who am I to block them, So believe it when I tell you that Society’s got you living for a whack cause. The bad things in this world are the stuff the society actively mirrors, projects & amplifies, approving as mainstream popular culture while the good things remain in the dark backgrounds away from the limelight.

Society is like a person keeping his acquaintances stuck in a negative mind state pushing people to act in evil crazy ways. No one likes you when you are 18 without a plan. Am not some sort of Rabbi, but am trying to lift a generation in a society I view as destructive… Rescuing souls from their deepest confines of darkness to a beauty away from society evils.

Avoid drugs & Greed Peeps.

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WHATEVER FLOATS THE BOATS OF APATHETIC YOUTHS

Since rapping turned to fashion, I don’t know what happened coz now every other guy wants to be a propitious rapper with their sleeping punk ass excuses of ability to lip sync to a couple of rap songs. This is a big fool with narrow ambitions, Yeah, that’s as blunt as it gets, coz talent is key in rap.

I want to paint with words the mood of today’s lonely drugged out youth who seem more interested in Kush and Purple label tags than anything else. When I say the word fun what do you envision, probably drinking and smoking out with your crew and chilling with clueless women you trynna bang. You feeling like if you ain’t got drugs life’s not as complete. Drugs aren’t supposed to be popular culture. It ain’t fun to be you coz all your brain cells are rotting from weed.
Don’t let drugs live for you. They have a funny way of controlling one’s judgement and driving one into irrational activities later regretted.. Druggoluntary activities are fatal in the long run. I know you ain’t stupid.. You have been told this stuff.
Be yourselves, everyone is already taken.

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BIASED BEST RAPPER HIERARCHY RANKINGS

I hope that I am not the only one who frowns upon these lists of the best rappers. Frankly I think that the people who make these lists just wanna lick ass by not wanting to appear chauvinistic so they have to include Nikki Minaj, Not wanting to seem racist so EMINEM is included and very profusely wanting to honor and pay tribute to Hip Hop veterans like Rakim and NOTORIOUS B.I.G.

IF these people who rank Hip Hop artists fail to stop impressing Feminists and sects, An ultimate Hip Hop list with talented rappers will never be formed and they will never stop sounding biased.

Kinging With Opeezy The Kenyan Boy +254702161160

WHO THE HELL CROWNS HIMSELF AS KENYA’S HIP HOP KING?

This is a subject that I as a blogger really needs to rant about. First off: Who brought this conversation to the Kenyan table, Juliani The Gospel Artiste. Shouldn’t you be calling out Willy Paul or Ekko Dyda or perhaps dissing the devil, Like what are you, you ain’t even a rapper, its more of a spoken word poet. You call out the de facto best Kenyan Hip Hop Artists for a battle then you flop by producing a track like “LORD FORGIVE ME”. Jesus of Nazareth.. This shouldn’t be cried at.. People should start mourning because it ain’t even a song let alone a disstrack. Disstracks have wordplay and subliminals, its more of a spot to show your prowess as An emcee. Not embarrass yourself like JULIANI. This dude should just go sit his ass down in the cold corner he was so comfortable in (SILENCE). Nigga we all thought you were  wise till you opened up your mouth and spoke whack shit that makes us ooze blood just by listening to.

Now you Khaligraph Jones, you let us down, Why The Hell did you even pay attention to that loser. Now I am also on your case, You also ain’t King in 254. Y’all bitches, King Kaka, Octopizzo and Khaligraph when you think you can crown yourselves and force down the fact of King down our throats. Khaligraph is highly esteemed only because he raps very fast and his delivery sick. But he lacks content just claptrap airless lyrics.. That’s why he goes speed. For you not to hear a word he said.

I sat and noticed that real Kenyan Hip Hop is out there but it is not mainstream. People like Ace Tha Don & Shukid are the 254 Kings and that’s final. Just go listen to their songs and am sure you will agree.

Other than the mainstream whackiness in Hip Hop there are other underrated talents in Kenya. Only until you listen to every Kenyan Hip Hop Artiste will you then dismiss the 3 conceited bitches proclaiming themselves as King. Juliani is a cockroach.

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